"A transplant or staying at home is a choice."

Scene 1 

Kochu Thresia is a wealthy elderly widow who longs to live life on her own terms, but she feels alienated by her children who are too focused on making money. In contrast, her best friend and neighbor, Kunju Maria, is a gentle woman with a talent for cooking. Both women are conscientious and never miss Sunday mass, but they also enjoy indulging in a bit of gossip when they meet at church. They both embody the values of love, family, and companionship. Unfortunately, their daughters and daughters-in-law are unkind and manipulative, and there are also love interests involved, some living with Thresia and others residing in different locations for their own reasons and convenience.

A few days before Easter, Kunju Maria called Kochu Thresia to tell her that she had been summoned to the USA by her children. When Kochu Thresia commented on how lucky she was to have children who loved her and wanted her to be with them, Kunju Maria laughed it off, saying that her children only wanted a maid for child care and a homemaker without paying wages. She expressed her anguish and sobbed as she talked about being buried in that strange land with unpronounceable names and her feelings of being uprooted. Kunju Maria revealed that this might be the last meeting of the old friends and asked them not to come to see her off, breaking down in tears.

The above is a scene from a  Malayalam film (The year 2003), "Manassinakkare" (Beyond the Mind), which is a heartwarming portrayal of an old mother's journey, presented sincerely and touchingly. The real-life scenario has not changed for the better from the reel life, even after a decade. It is not a single case, but a phenomenon. In Kerala, many houses are left vacant for months as the elderly inhabitants are abroad with their children mostly in similar situations. The government has recently started charging taxes for such properties as a source of income. Looks strange!

Scene 11.

"Have a nice time and a safe journey “, said the Doctor. The elderly couple, both with chronic heart disease, were medically fit to undertake the long journey to the USA after their check-up in the clinic. Thanking him, Krishnaswamy and Lalitha, smilingly said,”  Doctor, We have been there thrice. Visiting on a holiday for a few weeks is refreshing, but now we are going there to our daughter, who is due for delivery.  And to look after the kitchen and later babysitting job. Snow and severe winter await us, no way to go out. Don’t have any friends or friendly neighbors to mix up with. Our son-in-law has already sent the tickets and arranged transport to ease our travel. Our bad days already have set in and it is depressing “.

The doctor heard them silently. 

The airport lounges in Bangalore, Chennai, or other cities with direct flights to the USA or Australia are often filled with Krishnaswamis and Lalithas, elderly couples in their late sixties and beyond. Despite appearing outwardly healthy, their faces reflect the weight of their similar life experiences.

SCENE 111: 

I recently read an article in a journal about a famous university campus in the USA that celebrated a unique event: transplanting a very tall and over two centuries-old oak tree without using a scalpel or causing any blood spill! They created a huge pit all around the tree and secured it with metal pipes fixed deep under the roots, eventually transporting it to its new location. It was unclear whether the tree liked its new environment, the new set of birds, or squirrels, but as days passed, everything seemed to be at ease and nobody seemed to care.

Relocating can be quite challenging. Throughout our lengthy tenure working for the government, we have had to relocate to various regions of the country due to transfers. Our children were excited and quickly adapted to new houses, schools, and friends. As adults, we also had to adjust despite the lack of choice.

The elderly parents cherish their small but "cozy" bedroom, along with the other items they have held onto over the years. They also value their close friends and their strong faith in God, which they hold dear. Their temple is located at the far end of the street.

Shouldn't society respect and allow individuals (regardless of gender) who choose to stay at home, whether due to health issues, family circumstances, or simply to avoid the rat race, to live in peace?

t😒